Natasha’s Notebook » 2009

A letter to the Pope

October 25th, 2009 by Natasha

Your Holiness, Pope Benedict XVI,

It is with great pleasure I write to you but unfortunately the matter I wish to raise is not particularly pleasurable. You see I disagree with your decision to welcome all those Anglican leaders into the Roman Catholic faith, which is indeed my own religion from birth.
Reasons
The reasons they wish to enter the Catholic Church is because they disagree with women becoming Bishops within the Anglican Church.
Please do not get me wrong, I am not asking for women to become Bishops or priests in the Catholic Church, this is for another letter, but surely the message you give in accepting our Anglican brothers and sisters include:
‘Yes, you can become Catholic, not because you want to be Catholic but because you want to make a point to the Bishops who have decided to accept a decision you disagree with.
You rebel priests you
‘Yes, you can become Catholic, and when you disagree with a decision we make? Well we’ll deal with that later, you rebel priests, you.
‘Yes, you can become Catholic, we have had a number of child-abuse scandals but this is not as bad as having a holy person who is not a man, preside over a Mass.’
You are in my prayers dear Holy Father, forget the politics and listen to your heart.

Posted in Observations, Today's News | No Comments

Love after death

October 25th, 2009 by Natasha

A STORY which grabbed my attention this week was the sad, unsolved murder case of Vikki Thompson, the mother of two who was found beaten to death after walking the family dog near her home in Oxfordshire in August 1995.
A 34-year old man has been arrested in relation to this case due to advances in technology and is in custody.
The aspect which stirred me about this tale of loss was the fact that her husband, Jonathan later married Vikki’s best friend, a Mrs Simpson.
Best friend
To lose a partner is a huge loss and I simply cannot imagine how someone even starts to come to terms with it. But it did make me question what my husband would do.
You see it is very hard to imagine your parner with anyone else apart from you, because we like to think we are the last person our partners will ever be with.
We can accept past relationships but not so much the relationships which come after us.
Three months?
And when I later read a letter sent to You magazine’s Zelda West-Meads, from a man asking the agony aunt if three months is too soon to start dating his late fiancee’s sister, well I had to note it down in my notebook.

Posted in Observations, Today's News | No Comments

Our favourite memories of Angelina Santangelo, 14 April 1926-14 October 2009

October 24th, 2009 by Natasha

MY beloved grandmother died last Wednesday. Her funeral was three days ago and here is the Eulogy which my uncle Rino read at the end of the wonderful service presided by Padre Carmelo at the Italian Church…

Angelina’s Children

• Her laughter and her wonderful warmth I will cherish forever. She was such a generous person. She put everyone before herself. Angelina was a very kind person. She worked hard and she lived for her family. The sacrifices she made just puts my everyday moaning to shame. She thrived and thoroughly enjoyed giving all she could to her family.
I used to tease her sometimes and pull her hat over her face and wait to see her get all flustered. She simply got on with things; there was never a stumbling block. For a little person ~ she was a giant.
I gave her so much grief, just as any lively son gives his mother growing-up. While out shopping at her usual Angel Market, all those years ago, I knew that if I asked her to buy me a toy in English rather than in Italian, she would not be able to say no because everyone around would have heard me. How she would get upset with me.
Everyone who came into contact with Angelina, loved her, even her lodgers from those years ago when both Angelina and Gennaro rented out rooms to Italian students through the Italian Church.
She held Padre Carmelo in great esteem. When Padre Carmelo came home to eat one Sunday, she was on Cloud Nine for a month. (And she made sure all the other Consorelle knew about it.)

• And who can forget that practical joke played on her - a true example of her desire to accommodate everyone - when a certain family member pretended to be Padre Carmelo and phoned to say there were two students arriving that night from Italy and needed a room.
Ten minutes later ‘Padre Carmelo’ called again to say the two had risen to six. A little time after, another phone call told Angelina that there were now twenty Italian young men to be accommodated in her house!
How they all laughed when ‘Padre Carmelo’ replied to Angelina’s panic regarding their comfort ‘ahh.. not to worry Angelina, half of them are short so you can put them on top of wardrobes – they are not fussy, really!’

• I have a life-time of happy memories thanks to her. Whether she was upset or happy, one thing always remained – love. There is a phrase in Italian ‘e’ una roccia di amore’, (She was a rock of love). During her last few years, the woman I used to go to for advice was not the same person due to illness and old age. I really missed her point her views on my concerns.

• I will always remember her being happy. At times she would get upset and that was all part of her character. She was full of love and was always laughing and joking around. I used to wind her up as any son does to their mother I suppose. She was full of life and happiness. She always looked-after others.

• What she meant to me is indescribable. She was the most wonderful, honest, generous mother anyone could hope to have. And her generosity knew no limits. She’s the best, above the rest!
I will never forget the time we all went to Italy and I was expecting Natasha. As my mum boarded the plane via the adjoining tunnel she asked out loud: “Goodness, is all of this flying with us to Italy?” And my dad responded, in the classic way he always used to tease her: “This silly woman! If we went by ship she would probably think the whole port would depart with us?!”

• She was a tough old girl and very strong. My mum had to fight for everything in her life and she worked for her family. She tried everything. And above all – love. My mum was all giving and she treated all of us the same. There was absolutely no malice in her. She was a really good person, a great lady. I do not know one person who did not like my mum. She was good hearted and I miss her for that. She had lots of friends. Where-ever she went, people knew her. I cannot remember her having a row with any of her friends.

Angelina’s daughter-in-laws

• I loved to go shopping with her. She provided me with great comfort; when I left Italy at the age of 17 to live here… she was not a mother-in-law to me, she was a mother. In fact I used to call her ‘mum’. I am going to miss her so much. Her legacy is Love. I know she wanted her family to become as one again.

• The way she watched football was a spectacle in itself. She would get so excited when Italy or Napoli or England played. Considering she was quite frail towards her later years it was so funny to watch – she did like her football.

The way she used to tease Isabella about taking Jack to Italy with her. First she would ask Isabella if she wanted to go to Italy with her and when Isabella would reply ‘no’ she would say ‘ok I’m taking Jack’. Isabella would then protest: ‘my Jack’ and Angelina would then reply: ‘your Jack? Did you make him?’ ~ she always had the best last lines.

The first Italian word I learnt thanks to Angelina was ‘mangia, mangia’ (eat, eat). It was her catchphrase!

She loved her house being full of people. When we moved house, we needed a place to live, while our new home was being installed with central-heating. Both Angelina and Gennaro put us up and to me, this was a complete and amazing act of kindness.

And the way she accepted Jack, my son from a previous relationship, into her heart and family was, well, I will never forget it.

Angelina’s grandchildren

• I will always remember Nonna taking me to the shop when I was a child and buying me a huge Cornetto. She was always warm and lovely. Nonna always had a cuddle at the ready and a big welcoming smile on her face.

• On Saturdays I used to go shopping with her, to her usual Angel Market. It was quite a scene to see her speaking in Italian to all the stall holders and them replying ‘yes mum’ ~ everyone called her mum.

• During the last few years, when Nonna wasn’t as strong as she used to be, when-ever I used to sit with her she would turn to me and say: “when I get some money I am going to buy you something special”. I knew this was her way of saying thank-you.
She would then go on: “Anyone who hurts you – I will kill them”. She would get so excited whenever mummy would buy her a new necklace and also whenever Uncle Angelo would buy her an ice-cream.

Nonna would always ask me what year I am at school and then go on to say how she came top of her class each year and even made it to secondary school.

• I always remember Nonna at her home, watching her programmes and game-shows. She was always offering cups of tea and she was full of love. She had a great sense of humour and was always laughing. She had a very honest love.

• Nonna and Nonno took me in for a few months. I will never forget that. Nonna would always offer me money and of course food and cups of tea. She just made me feel completely at ease and at home. That time I spent with them was special and I will always treasure the memory.

• If I had to describe the word ‘grandmother’ ~ I would say ‘Angelina Santangelo, my Nonna’. She had the ability to make you feel so ‘at home’ and looked-after. My Nonna was like chicken soup for the soul. I have so many memories of Nonna and through those recollections I will always feel her love and she will make me smile for the rest of my life.

I have such a vivid memory of being about three years old, we were at her big old house in Carysford Road, I had ventured upstairs and somehow got very scared when it came to making my way down. Suddenly those steps seemed like mini mountains to climb down. So I cried and called out to her and sure enough she appeared instantly. She came and helped me down so that I wasn’t scared anymore.

In no time at all, it seems, I found myself helping her down the stairs in our house. It is amazing how outstretched arms can make all the difference. I just hope my arms gave her even an ounce of the security she gave to me - then I know I would have repaid her somehow.

May her peace-loving ways be an example to us all… Angelina ~ rest in peace.

Posted in Out and about in London, Observations | No Comments

Tell us something we don’t know

October 17th, 2009 by Natasha

APPARENTLY there is an imminent documentary to be screened on Channel Four regarding a number of put-up jobs devised by the channel to see if the red-tops believed their lies about celebrities.
Mayhem
Actors for the show phoned the show-biz pages with made-up stories of mayhem at certain celebrity home-parties, for example.
And what they found was not only did the journalists on these publications not check the validity of these tales but they also added made-up quotes from ‘a chum’ or ‘a friend’.
Mistake
What I cannot get over is this: does Channel Four think we do not know this already? A mistake the media sometimes make - is that they think that the public is stupider than they are.

Posted in Observations, TV, Today's News | No Comments

Enough to make your eyes water

October 17th, 2009 by Natasha

ACCORDING to one of Britain’s top business woman, excessive maternity leave and eye-watering sex discrimination payouts could backfire on women.
The newspapers reported this week that Nicola Pease, deputy chairman of JO Hambro capital management denied allegations of sexism in the City, claiming most women did not rise through the ranks because of their own choices rather than any prejudice against them.
Moneyed mother of three
I could not believe my eyes when I read what this moneyed, mother of three told the Treasury Select Committee meeting. This woman, who together with her hedge fund manager husband is worth £204 million, went on to say that although women in the workplace were ‘a really capable, practical and driven bunch of multi-taskers’ – bosses might be reluctant to employ them for fear they could go on to have lots of children supported by over-generous maternity leave.
Scandalous
Now, I am only repeating her scandalous words to condemn them. If I were a newspaper editor I would not even report her ridiculous comments for horror that it may seep into the consciousness of even one boss out there, be it man or woman.
Since the beginning of this year, I have been working at a University where I am very happy. It is a great place to work. My colleagues are all such intelligent, caring and reasonable people.
Short sightedness
And I would not be there if it was not for a woman who went on maternity leave. So I wonder what Mrs Pease would say about that? Surely she would not have it that people were unemployed rather than winning an opportunity to cover someone’s maternity leave with the chance of impressing bosses that they keep you on. Such short-sightedness – this makes my eyes water!

Posted in Observations, Today's News | No Comments

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A letter to the Pope

Love after death

Our favourite memories of Angelina Santangelo, 14 April 1926-14 October 2009

Tell us something we don’t know

Enough to make your eyes water